


(while you count clouds)

by softly (alexenglish)



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Robots & Androids, Other, Possibly Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 02:25:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11864691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexenglish/pseuds/softly
Summary: When you’re around I don’t know how to hide my feelings.  I count in binary, in my head.  zero one one zero one one and you count clouds.





	(while you count clouds)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [clarz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/clarz/gifts).



> [a softer world project](http://queerlyalex.tumblr.com/asofterworld)

 

It’s late.

So late Louis doesn’t actually want to know how late it is. It’s easy to lose track of time in the lab. The unwavering florescent lights, the dull thrumming of machinery. Not that Louis is productive for hours on end, but they slip by easy one way or another. Whether he’s nose-to-computer-screen, or running tests, or whatever. The point is that he gets caught up.

It’s late, and he’s not actually doing anything worthwhile right now. All he’s doing is tweaking code. It’s boring. His eyes burn behind his glasses.

“Shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

Louis jumps nearly two feet in the air before twirling his chair towards the entrance to the lab. Niall’s stood there, pale as snow, eyes bright blue electric. Louis pushes out a breath.

“Make noise when you walk,” Louis says, turning back to his code. He’s lost his place. His eyes are too tired to sort it out so he clicks out. It’s probably what Niall wanted.

“So you tell me,” Niall says, walking towards Louis silently. Today’s uniform is slate grey, standard issue, bare feet. There must have been testing whilst Louis was on the upper levels for training.

“Cheeky,” Louis says, chin jerking towards Niall’s soft steps. Niall smiles.

“Sleeping? You should be.”

“‘You should be sleeping’,” Louis corrects. It’s automatic. Niall’s eyes roll like a teenager’s. It’s hard to ignore the ridiculous pout, but Louis manages. He shuts down his computer, shrugging. “Extra work never hurt anyone.”

“Does when they’ve been here for nearly 12 hours now,” Niall says, leaning against the desk next to Louis’ computer, arms and ankles crossed.

“S’late,” Louis comments, rubbing at his eyes, knocking his frames sideways. Niall smiles and rights them Louis drops his hand, fingertips straightening them out before sliding down Louis’ cheek. Louis ignores that, forces out a, “Thanks.”

“I worry about you,” Niall says quietly, sincerely.

Louis would believe it, if the electric blue of Niall’s eyes wasn’t literally _electric_. He can hear the soft whir of the computer in Niall’s chest. He _built_ that computer. “You don’t,” Louis points out, ignoring the way his stomach squirms. No, absolutely not.

“I do,” Niall insists.

They’ve had a version of this conversation before. At first Louis could have it with conviction, now he’s tired of it. “Okay,” he says, shutting down his laptop as Niall watches. He stands, stretches, feels Niall’s fingers circle his wrist.

“Louis.” Niall’s voice is small and quiet, grip gentle and firm.

Louis isn’t the most tan. He’s a Donny lad, for fuck’s sake. Holed up in a lab all day. Gets more exposure to blue light than UV, but Niall is still paperwhite next to him. That’s the only giveaway, really. That, the irises, and the way the computer’s hum is so unlike a heart beating.

Everything else is very human. It’d be terrifying if Louis wasn’t so excited about what it meant for the company, for the future of robotics. Hair, moles, deceptively rhythmic breathing. Wetness in the mouth and eyes, softness of the paperwhite skin. It’s all very real.

“Louis,” Niall says again, tugging. Louis lets himself be pulled in, lets Niall touch his neck, fingertips right over his pulse. This close, Niall is warm. Warm like a human body. Breathing unnecessarily, mechanical heart whirring in the silence of the lab.

“Niall,” Louis says, even though he knows it’s a mistake. Niall smiles, soft and curving. It looks so genuine. Louis flushes and puts some space between them.

“Why do you use a name?” Niall asks, head tilting, still looking so damn pleased.

“N. I-A11 is a mouthful,” Louis shrugs.

He hadn’t thought that it would mean anything at the time. Here was this model that was pleasantly lifelike, but not _too_ lifelike. He could tell the difference. He _built_ the model. Put in all the pieces, did the programming. Was constantly updating code, making adjustments.

He _could_ tell, but then Niall booted up, and now the line is getting more and more blurry as time goes on. As Niall learns things Louis didn’t teach, and develops opinions so different from Louis’ own, and emotes --

Pretends to emote. Well, doesn’t ‘pretend’, but it’s not organic. Niall’s emotions aren’t organic. They _can’t_ be -- Niall isn’t organic.

Now he can’t stop using the name, and Niall _enjoys_ that Louis uses the name, and they both know it means something more than it should. To Louis, at least. He doesn’t know if anything can have _true_ meaning for Niall.

These are thoughts he used to voice aloud, so the lab would record them into his notes, but Niall started to argue with him about it. So much so that it stopped being worth it. Niall seems to think there are genuine emotions and feelings inside all that coding. Ones that can and should be known, and that’s where the line is blurry.

Blurry and desperately confusing. It’s all too philosophical. There’s a reason he’s in science, robotics. Codes and algorithms never used to demand he think about the human condition.

Until Niall, of course, and now that’s _exactly_ what they do. Now they’re shaped like a person with eerie LED blue eyes, and an all too sincere voice -- and Louis doesn’t even know where that voice came from. Some actor somewhere? An intern? Made to say everything imaginable so that the AI could record, and repeat, and learn how to speak from that…

Now they demand that he considers the human condition any time Niall does _anything_ at all, but especially when Niall says shite like, ‘I worry about you.’ Can Niall _really_ worry?

“You’re thinking loudly,” Niall says, with a disappointed huff.

“About what?” Louis asks, challenge in his voice.

Niall’s chin tilts stubbornly, eyes narrowing. “Me, probably.”

Well.

“Shouldn’t you be plugged in, charging somewhere?” Louis asks, busying his hands with his laptop bag, awkwardly reaching around Niall for his cords.

“That’s what I’m asking you,” Niall says lightly, staying put. Staying in Louis’ _way_.

“Cheeky,” Louis says, nudging their shoulders together, hinting at Niall to move. Niall doesn’t budge. Louis sighs and looks up, meeting Niall’s eyes. They’re really close, again, of course they are.

“D’you think,” Niall says, eyes darting all over Louis’ face. Louis’ stomach squirms. “If I were a person -- do you think this is where you’d kiss me?”

“Niall,” Louis says, too startled to be angry.

“I came to check on you,” Niall says. Sometimes there’s no inflection to the way Niall says things, voice flat and deliberately robotic. This is the opposite of that. It’s full of some tentative emotion that Louis doesn’t really want to name. “That’s what people do when they care, right? Tell you to sleep and eat. Tell you to do something besides press your nose to a computer screen all day.”

Niall laughs lightly and looks at the ground. There’s a slight flush to Niall’s cheeks, a deceptive pinking that was recently coded for the interface. Louis thought it’d be a good idea, since Niall’s so sure of these emotions. If Niall thought the situation was appropriate, the methods could be activated manually.

Now he doesn’t think it’s such a good idea, makes Niall look terribly fucking human.

Niall’s throat works, swallowing harshly. “If I were a person,” Niall says, still guarded and hesitant, looking up at Louis shyly, a peek of blue through blonde lashes. “You might like me enough to kiss me back.”

“Kiss you back?” Louis asks. And he knows it’s coming, but he still doesn’t move when Niall leans in. Warm fingertips slide up the tender inside of Louis’ arm, Niall’s hand cups Louis’ elbow to keep him near, and then their mouths catch softly, more of a graze than a kiss.

Niall’s breath catches audibly before releasing in a quiet sigh. Louis can feel it against his lips as they kiss properly, more firmly. Niall smells a bit sterile, like everything else in this building, but tastes like… skin.

There’s something off about it, like drinking coke zero when you’ve asked for regular. The artificial sweetener taste you don’t recognize immediately, not as strong as diet, but definitely not real sugar.

Niall’s grip tightens, tugs Louis in so they’re lined up properly, bodies pressing together. Niall feels so strangely human against him -- warm, body soft where’s he’s accidentally grabbed Niall’s hip.

Louis breaks away when Niall tries to deepen the kiss, a shiver of want down his spine when Niall licks out against his lips with a slick tongue, but Louis really _shouldn’t_ \--

“Sorry,” Niall says, letting Louis take his step back, hand sweeping across damp lips like erasing it might make either of them feel better about the situation.

“I can’t,” Louis says unnecessarily.

There’s a nod before Niall looks at Louis a bit hopelessly. “I care about you,” Niall says, voice thick, cheeks still red, eyes more wet than Louis wants them to be. “I know you don’t think I do, but I do.”

“Niall,” Louis says, and doesn’t know what else to say. He wants to reach out and tug Niall closer, into a hug. Wants to kiss Niall again so they didn’t have to have this conversation. Wants Niall to understand that he shouldn’t want any of this.

“I dream about you,” Niall says, eyes fluttering shut, mouth twitching like there’s a smile lurking under the sadness. “When I’m _charging_ , y’know? Dream about sunshine and clouds, and holding your hand.”

“It’s not…” _Real_ , Louis wants to say, but he can’t stand the thought of making Niall sad, no matter how contrived that sadness might be. “It’s not that easy.”

“I know.” Niall does smile then, shrugs like it doesn’t matter.

Louis thinks it really does, and he has no idea what to do with that.

**Author's Note:**

> [reblog on tumblr](http://queerlyalex.tumblr.com/post/164432812632/while-you-count-clouds-nialllouis-16k)


End file.
